Episode 1 - As told by Keebler Wasdwarven

Of course it was the most interesting breakfast of my life. As Elvish invited us to sit, the windling requested a windling size highchair to be drawn up to the table. Elvish just laughed and told her to touch the chair. She looked a bit skeptical but realized that when she touched the chair, it instantly changed to the windling size and height requirements needed to be seated at the same table as the rest of us. She was rather delighted by this and proceeded to play tricks on Elvish and touch his chair for chance to make him fall. However, being his butt was actually in the chair, nothing happened and she disappointedly sat down with the rest of us.

I was a bit confused by all of this, last I had checked, my last memory was of me fighting and losing my life to a horror. I realized unfortunately that I was not able to save the lives of the people inside, in an attempt at a last stand in front of the doors of the kaer. In a bitter disappointment not tasted in death, the realization of letting lose a horror in the caves of all those people swept over me. Nothing was as horrible or shocking as that.

But this morning came close, as I looked in the mirror after I had woken up and saw a male elf staring back at me.

I'm obviously a dwarf. Well at least I was. This must be an illusionists trick as I was clearly a female dwarven horrorstalker before. Keebler Elf fought horrors her entire life, I thought stubbornly, as I looked up at Elvish and asked what happened. He gave me a confused shrug, as he looked sideways at Mumsford, who mumbled about "threads crossed" "legends" and "Peanut Butter Sandwiches."

"Mumsford indicates that you, little lady, ahem... well the legends of you are that you were an elf, and we sort of assumed you were male." "My last name is Elf!!!" I objected. I watched him rather skeptically as he looked down and realized that Kaylee had shrunken his plate to windling size when he wasn't looking. He pointed at the troll and said, "Would you mind, huh..." and pointed at his plate suggestively. Garok reached out and touched his plate silently, increasing it to gargantuan proportions. Who would want that much pork chop for breakfast?

Elvish dug in, careful not to touch the plate and quickly subverted the subject to encourage us to travel to the Green Griffin, a pub in Bartertown to meet Chen and Sprohgsarpe. Elvish believes they can help us in our quest to save the tainted Obsidman Liferock. Of course he believed that I was an elf too...

~Keebler~